merchaydeez

Been so lazy. I've been so fucking sick. It's disgusting.

But seriously I haven't put a vlog in so long and I'm still working on the one I have now. I'm such a failure. I need to find something to major in or something. College can really stress a girl out. Boo. But for now, I've enjoyed my time alone. I've watched a few weird movies and enjoyed them like always. French movies are always my favorite: The Diving Bell and the Butterfly. So good. So invincible. Love that movie. I have the hardest time remembering movies I like and names. Bad bad bad. But that movie is epic.

Another HUGE FACT THAT I HAVE BEEN AVOIDING. HELLO? I must show you pictures of... CANCUN. :) Fun fun. Not as dramatic as it seemed. With a boy I love&included are complcations. Oh, life.

The INCREDIBLE view from my room:

The Private beach that I laid on EVERY SINGLE DAY. You can never get sick of a beach that bright with the warmest water. Me and Matt were that cheesey couple that never stopped laughing. What? Cheesey? Annoying? All of the above. Did I give a flying eff? Nope. Too Happy. Too much fun. :)

View at sunset from our room: Seriously. This just reminds me of fancy drinks and yummy guacamole. I don't even like guacamole, but there it was so good. It's so refreshing and freeing to sit on a deck that's crappy as hell watching the sun go down, feel the warm breeze, with a dos equis, a margarita or a dacharie going so smoothly down your throat.

Morning view. I'm sorry. I couldn't help it. the view was so beautiful and I can't get over it.

VERY VERY BIG FLAG. VERY VERY amusing.

"Margarita y Marijuana". Epic. hahah... funny.

me y mateo. Waiting for a tourist bus to go to the ruins. Boredom=picture taking. You know what I mean.

Mayan Ruins:

SENOR FROGS: So cheesey... yet so much fun. :)










I'm weird. DEAL WITH IT. hahah... I like having fun and being weird and goofy. I can't help it.

More thinking: I've learned a lot of things. But I have yet to learn much about me. Maybe I have... but honestly things like college and the future are overtaking my mind. The pressures all around me are scaring me and pushing me away from trying. I'm too afraid to try. I'm too afraid to become like everyone else stuck in a meaningless job that I hate. Where am I? Where am I heading? I'm ready to find out who I want to be. Who I'm going to be. But is that right for me to do? Is that what I'm meant to do? So many questions. I'm sorry if I'm confusing you. It's understandable why you'd be confused because I don't understand it myself. I'm comfortable in who I am... but I don't understand who I am. I'm gonna stop rambling and I'm going to take a breather.

Another day will go by without these thoughts. With just fun. With just smiles and laughter. nd distracted by stupid, superficial drama that everyone secretly loves (as long as it doesn't invovle self [at times])

Anyway... I'm getting tired. I know I didn't write much and I apologize for that. But I"m going to rest a little... i.e. sleepiez.

Lots of love for buzznet. For Real. I LOVE BUZZNET. it's true love. DEAL haha... ok.

Love and kisses, my buzznet dolls. Have good summer and sleeps.

Merchaydeez.